Disability Blog Carnival
[Rewritten because I lost my internet connection - I'm on a poor-quality wireless connection right now.]
I missed the disability blog carnival again. Last time I wrote something late for it. I don't know if I'll do it again, because of the old familiar shame and fear of seeming stupid linked to many of my autism-related problems. It's hard to even mention this because my usual strategy is to ignore or dismiss mistakes. Saying openly that I feel bad about making a mistake is hard, unless I 'flick the switch' for an attack of self-hate.
I put a thing on the bottom of my blog which may help me remember in the future (of course, I might forget about it. Maybe I'll move it somewhere more visible).
I missed the disability blog carnival again. Last time I wrote something late for it. I don't know if I'll do it again, because of the old familiar shame and fear of seeming stupid linked to many of my autism-related problems. It's hard to even mention this because my usual strategy is to ignore or dismiss mistakes. Saying openly that I feel bad about making a mistake is hard, unless I 'flick the switch' for an attack of self-hate.
I put a thing on the bottom of my blog which may help me remember in the future (of course, I might forget about it. Maybe I'll move it somewhere more visible).
Labels: autism, Disability Blogs, PTSD
posted by Ettina at 1:54 PM
1 Comments:
I don't quite understand this post. Do you really mean that you are feeling unhappy for such a minor reason as missing the optimal date to publish a particular post?
BTW, I think Blogger had an option to change the date of a post (I'm too lazy to open a Blogger window to check), why not use it if it is really important?
Your enemies will call you stupid anyway. Many people try to have the last say in controversies not by disproving their opponent's arguments but by attacking the opponent personally, by hurting and humiliating him. My own strategy is (1) never to believe them and (2) not to challenge them on this topic. "Yes, I admit I am stupid, ignorant, hateful and bad-looking. Now, what about addressing my arguments?"
It is worse when you yourself think you may be stupid, ugly... It has happened to me also. Have you read Lagerlof's "Gosta Berlings saga"? There was a warning for girls to beware "self-observation, this ghost with icy eyes and hookish fingers who crawls inside your soul, touches every item and shouts to you, "Look, all these are just rags, rags, rags!""
Don't give in.
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